Note to Self: Don’t Drive Over Fire, Especially in Ammo-Filled Van
Russ Chastain 10.19.15
Clay County, Kansas – You can’t make this stuff up. People are so much weirder in real life.
For instance, imagine yourself in a field, burning some trash. Most of us have done that, right? Now imagine the fire getting out of control. It could easily happen without proper care.
So what do you do? Well, I would personally try to fight the flames by hand with whatever I had at hand: a jacket, a shovel, maybe a floor mat from my van–but never the van itself.
But that’s exactly what the owner of this van did, according to the Kansas City Star. Yep, you heard me correctly:
In an attempt to put the fire out, he drove his van back and forth over the flames.
A genius move it was not. Adding to the drama was an unspecified amount of ammo that was in the van.
This made matters worse, as the tires of the van caught fire. Realizing that the van was loaded with firearms ammunition and a full tank of gas, the driver evacuated the area for safety.
Sigh. Sometimes I just want to break down and weep for humanity.
A deputy spotted the flames from a distance and investigated. The fire department later arrived to ensure that the fire didn’t spread.
The deputy did not immediately cite the owner, who declined to make a report for a possible insurance claim.
‘It seems like he’s just going to have to take a loss on that vehicle because I don’t think they’re going to cover it,’ [sherrif’s office spokesman] Bazzano said.
Does this guy deserve a Darwin award, or what?